FIRE HYDRANTS

This is such a rip off. I'm telling you that the person who came up with these things is one sick puppy.

I need some fire the other day to help get the wood in my fireplace to burn. I was fresh out of matches and figured well shoot, I've never tried these fire hydrants before so why not give them a shot.

Boy was that a mistake. There I was taking off the cap and holding a piece of wood, expecting to have some flame shoot out and I ended up getting drenched by water.

What of sick, degenerated mind puts water in a place that is suppose to have fire? If that is some person's idea of practical joke, I'm not personally laughing.

Now I did want to complain about this problem. So I started out by calling up the city to explain how somebody had messed up.

It wouldn't have been so bad, but I kept having problems with my phone connection. Every time I started explaining things I ended up getting disconnected.

I guess that was some kind of problem with their phone lines. Probably the same one that the people at the cable company have when I call there.

Well the good news was finally after about twenty calls I did manage to get somebody to talk long enough without being disconnected to tell me I need to call the fire department. I figured that made sense. After all a place that specializes in being a department having to do with fire would surely be the one place to appreciate how big a problem this was.

Only problem I had was that I kept getting disconnected when I talked to them too. Guess the phones in our town really don't work that good.

Finally, I ended up speaking to some guy called the fire Chief. Now why they needed some head Indian dude to be in charge of the fire department I got no idea, but he sure didn't seem to get the problem.

Anyway, I never did get to talk to anyone who promised to fix those hydrants. Guess they had too many other problems.

The chief dude mentioned he might send somebody by my apartment to fix my wagon. Which seemed really strange since there is nothing wrong with it that I know of.

Perhaps the chief's problem was like those Indians in the movies who they say go crazy after using fire water. Boy I don't think I want any of that from the way the chief was acting.

And if he doesn't send someone over to look at my wagon, maybe they can help me with a fire too. Providing the find one of those hydrants that work right.