TAKING IT GREASY

There are some real strange people out there that are running around saying grease is bad for you. I mean I never eat grease. It is okay for using on wheels I guess, but I never took a big handful and stuffed it in my mouth. The very idea sort of turns my stomach to be honest.

So I'm not sure who they know that does something stupid like that, but it ain't mean. About the only thing I ever do in terms of grease is to eat stuff that had grease in it at one time. Such as say burgers.

Heck, the way I figure all that grease pretty much got cooked away, so it shouldn't be something to worry about when I get around to eating it. And whatever didn't get fried up, shoot it just drips off the burgers and fries anyway, so I still don't end up eating it as far as I'm concerned.

As best as I can figure this whole deal is a problem started by some dude names Cold Lester All. Yeah, I guess being cold and named Lester would surely leave you in a mess in terms of attitude. And with a last name of All it must have been that way for him all the time, the poor dude.

The thing is I guess this guy is really a pain in the ass to deal with since I hear that dealing with him can lead to a person ending up with high blood pressure. That is probably where you are like standing on a chair or something to try and avoid this jerk. Which can be really a pain I imagine.

Now you would think this dude would have enough to worry about in life seeing how he ain't the most popular guy on the planet. However, it don't seem to be enough for him, which is why he apparently runs around doing weird junk to food such as hamburgers.

All I know is that if this guy ever shows up where I'm eating, he ain't touching my food no matter what. That way he can't do anything sneaky either.

Although I guess he does spend a lot of his spare time trying to gum up batteries. I hear that he also causes hardening of the batteries. Why you worry about how hard they are, I have no idea, but it must be a big deal if he's involved.

So there you have it. When you are out and having a good time, just beware of Lester running around. And if you see a dude with batteries who is eyeing your burger then I would surely do my best to avoid him.

I just hope passing on this information helps in some way. I figure there is no reason to let people have their good times ruin if I can help it.

And if we happen to meet at the burger joint sometime we can each take turns guarding our burgers. Yeah, that will teach that jerk, I reckon. Hope to see you there and ready to save the burger if necessary.