THE SIDELINES

This is a big deal I guess with that sport football. They seem to be extra concerned with sides and ends and all kinds of stuff. Why not only do they have lines marked off for stuff like ends, but that isn't enough. They call some of the players end too.

Although they don't seem concerned with having players called sides. Now they do tackle people and also guard them so they got players called tackles and guards. But what is confusing to me is how come they have both a tackle and a guard next to each other. What is up with that? Seems kind of pointless to have them next to each other if you ask me, but then nobody is asking me naturally.

But they got all these dudes who are in what they call the backfield and they all have back as part of their names. So how come none of them has a front? It doesn't make sense to me that you could have a back and no front, but I never hear of them having any front players.

Anyway another weird thing to me is they call them side lines, which in work is something you do part time, but the end is known as an end zone. That don't make a lot of sense either. Shouldn't it be both end zone and side zone or side lines and end lines? Who makes up this stuff anyway? I got no idea.

But when I think about it you know the one thing I appreciate is that you can't honestly expect some sport where you got dudes dressed up like bulging giants who spend the whole time doing nothing, but beating each other up to really make sense. I figure all of that trouble just to you know play with some little ball is kind of weird.

And that is another thing that bothers me. How come they call it a football when it doesn't look like a foot in anyway? Plus they spend most of the time holding it or tossing it so shouldn't it be called a handball? You got to wonder.

But I reckon that isn't up to me. And I can't help thinking to myself that you know the big deal here is that a lot of the stuff with these guys probably came up when they took their helmets off while still playing.

You know it probably was hot and nobody had much chance to think about it and one thing lead to another and before you knew it somebody got clobbered while not wearing his helmet. Then he had one of those deals, which seemed like a good idea even if it sucked and before you knew it the other guys thought it made sense.

Then after a while everyone thought it was cool, even if it was stupid. That is how it all begins I guess.

Which is all fine and good if somebody admitted how that was how it all started. But instead they probably just sat down and decided it was okay to the point nobody took time to appreciate it was dumb and stupid.

But then what can you expect from some game where you have these duds running around in black and white pajama tops who blow whistles before they raise their arms to show how well their underarm deodorant is working. Guess as long as it makes them happy that is the important thing huh?