GROSS VERSE NET

There was some whacky dude I heard the other day while I was stuffing my face at this burger joint who was talking about gross verses net. I guess he worked for a bank or some place that he made a big deal about the important of knowing the difference between gross profit and net profit.

Well let me tell you I know the difference. As a grimefighter I know that a gross profit is one you made off of something really disgusting that you have to call it gross. Like say if you managed to sell some rotting garbage. Now that would be gross profit to me. I don’t even know who you would get to buy that crap, but it sure would be gross.

As for the net thing, well I reckon that applies to people who go fishing a lot or catch butterflies or you know just about anyone who uses a net for one reason or another. The only thing I don’t get is how you couldn’t know the difference between making money from something gross and from something caught in a net. Sure doesn’t seem to me that would be hard to understand.

Anyway, after that guy got finished talking on his cell phone about gross and net profit I figured I would walk over to his table and make sure he understood what was really gross and what was net. I figured since he was so concerned with it that it might be a good thing if I saw to it that he understood them correctly.

All I can say is that I tried. Yep, I tried to be friendly and see to it that he had all the right facts to appreciate that terms correctly.

He didn’t seem to appreciate my efforts though. I tell you boy did he get kind of insulting too. He had the nerve to suggest that I didn’t know what I was talking about. Can you believe that?

Well at this point I tried to be nice and explain it some more, but eventually it just didn’t do any good. So in the end, I sort of had to end the conversation.

I guess it would have been cool if I had my bat with me at the time. I generally find it is a great way to end a conversation.

In this case I had to get creative a little. But know, it is nice how a chair works as good as a bat. And after I finished talking once my arms got tired from hitting him with that chair he sort of upchucked his lunch.

So I picked him up and showed him his lunch as it was looking gross on his chest. Believe me he sure understood the meaning of gross then. Pity I didn’t have a net with me at the time. But he didn’t seem to be in the mood to learn about that at the moment.

Anyway after that I left the place. Which is a good thing since they apparently had some big problem right after that because I heard the police sirens. I reckon maybe they thought gross was a bad thing too.