TEMPTING

Oh man is this a bad thing or what? I heard all about temptation from the Reverend Analbe. That is when the devil suckers you into doing something you think is cool and then he stabs you in the back. Boy he sure is one heck of a creep.

This temptation thing is really bad too because according to the Reverend it ends up with God being mad at you. He calls it sinning. And he doesn’t give you a pat on the back for it either. It is more like he sends you to that place other than where the angels hang out. Now I don’t want to scare anybody, but I heard they don’t even have jelly beans there. Can you imagine? Jeez how terrible is that? More than I want to imagine.

I have to admit that I didn’t quite get all the details on why temptation is completely bad. All I know from listening to Reverend Analbe is that pretty much anything that makes you happy is some form of sin. That is why his rule is “if it feels good, don’t do it.”

What kind of confuses me though is with the Reverend it is hard to tell when something really feels good and when it doesn’t. I mean when it comes to donuts he gobbles them suckers down like they were the best tasting things in the world. He’ll sit there and moan and groan while he’s eating them, but afterwards when he is wiping the crumbs and glaze from his face he says he doesn’t enjoy them. You could sure fool me.

The Reverend claims he mainly eats them, plus a whole lot of other stuff because it is to prove that is isn’t what he calls being “carnal.” From what I can understand that has something to do with loving stuff that is tempting or gives you pleasure. Personally with him I can’t tell the difference. He pretty much looks the same when he’s eating donuts as he does the rest of the time that he’s eating or doing something I think is pleasurable.

Well, I can’t pretend to understand all that stuff the way he does since God talks to him and not me. It might be nice if God did sort of take time to explain it more to the rest of us, but for now I guess I’ll just have to take the Reverend’s word for stuff.

Which means I’m going to try and avoid any of those tempting offers. I figure that way I won’t rush out and risk being tempted.

I just wish they didn’t get so proud of doing this tempting thing that they actually run ads in the paper. Like they had one the other day that came right out and said it was such a tempting offer that no one could resist. They were selling something, I forget what, but it was a buy one and get two free deal. I don’t know how that was so bad. I guess the getting two free must have been the tempting part. I think that would fall under what the Reverend calls “lust.” That is something if I understand him right that is sort of like rust in that it is bad only you can use any sandpaper to clean it off. Plus it is something that happens to your heart because he says how it is terrible to have lust in your heart.

I think I’ll just avoid any of those tempting offers and just stock up on donuts when I can. At least that way I know with my mouth and tummy full of donuts I can keep the lust from sneaking in my body. Here’s hoping you find a way to keep those lust things from attacking you too.