SUM FUN

I have trouble seeing this as really fun. I mean numbers are important, but fun? Not too me.

However there is this guy I know over at STINK who thinks counting junk is like being in heaven or something. My buddy Otis calls him a bean counter. Only I have to admit that I’ve never seen any count any beans. So I’m kind of skeptical about him really spending much time actually counting beans.

Plus that could get really messy as I see it. I could just see somebody sitting there and opening a big can of pork and beans and trying to count each bean. Even if you managed, what would be the point? It ain’t like they put the number of beans on the label for you to check to see if they are lying.

But regardless of that fact I do know that old Shelton, that’s his name, does have a real big hang up about numbers. He’s always carrying a calculator and if you do talk to him he will make sure that sooner or later Shelton will bring up the subject of counting.

I got nothing against counting. I do it for important stuff like counting jelly beans, but it isn’t like I can’t live without thinking about numbers like Shelton. For him he gets so completely jazzed by stuff like profit margins. As best as I can figure that is to me the about of margin space you have on a piece of paper when typing something. What is the benefit of seeing those empty margin spaces as a profit deal, I have no idea. I reckon it means you got more space to write other junk. Which I think to Shelton means it adds up in some way to something good. He’s always concerned with things adding up.

At the same time he also totally freaks out if he loses something. Man it is like some relative died or something. You should hear this guy go on and on fussing and feuding about loss. And at STINK he really gets stressed out if it involves the loss of a book.

I’m not sure why, but his main job at STINK is as our bookkeeper. Why we need anyone to keep a hold of our books I’m not sure. I mean we only have a few in the lunch room anyway. And he never seems to fret over those. But whenever he talks about what he calls a loss on the books, boy does he practically go berserk talking about it.

And he isn’t really all that grateful when somebody tries to help him either. Why shoot there was one day when he was groaning over this one loss and I felt sorry for him. So what I did was go out and get a couple of books to replace the ones he said he lost.

I figured he’d be so darn grateful when I gave them the books that he would be thrilled to have the ones without having had to pay for them. You would have thought he would have appreciated it. But he just looked at me like I was from Mars or something.

Too me I thought the books I gave him were really cool. Now I know not everyone is a big fan of comic books, but shoot a book is a book. Only he didn’t even say thank you. He just shook his head and mumbled something about me having a IQ deficit. I’m not sure what he meant by that, but I guess when I see him I’ll ask him if there is some pill you take for that like you do a vitamin deficiency.

THOUGHT FOR THE WEEK: "Being a pick pocket is suppose to be against the law. Unless it is the government. They can pick your pocket every pay day and say it is the law!"