THE FILE

This has to be one of the scariest things I know. At least over at STINK. Because the one thing I know is if I mess it that fact always goes into MY FILE. And I know that can’t be good!

What I know about this file is somebody keeps it in their pants. That sounds totally weird and disgusting, but I distinctly remember how I head them say the file was being put in a drawer. Why they would keep any file in somebody’s drawers I have no idea, it just don’t sound very good to me.

I mean even if you wanted to take a peek at this file I sure wouldn’t want to do it after somebody had been keeping it in their underwear. That just ain’t appealing to me.

I reckon that is one way of keeping them safe though. I know there is no way I’m walking up to anybody and sticking my hand down their pants to grab some file. That a darn sure way of getting beat up if you ask me.

I do wonder though if the person does take out the file before they change their underwear or do something else that requires them to change clothes? It seems like a fair question to me.

Now personally I’m not even clear on why they actually need to have this file thing. I would have thought judging from some of the things I’ve heard people say that wouldn’t have much trouble remembering the stuff they put in my file.

Lord knows old rat boy Junior Hemoglobin never forgets. Every time I see him he brings up something I did that he remembers and is suppose to be in my file. God I sure hope they don’t stick my file in HIS pants. That would really cheese me off. Darn I should never mention cheese and Junior in the same paragraph. Otherwise somebody might think I’m saying it is a good thing.

Well I don’t think I really want to find out for sure. And perhaps what I’ll do is figure out a way to start my own group of files. Since everyone freaks out when you mention them at STINK maybe it will be a good thing if I do it myself.

I’m not sure I want to put them in my underwear though. That sounds kind of painful. Well at least when the file has staples in it. I know that from past experience. Let me tell you staples can really leave some nasty scratches!

I suppose that is another in a long line of questions that I’ll have to figure out the answers to later. In the meantime I think I’ll drop by the stationary store and see if they have a bunch of different kinds of files. I ask that nice lady who works there which ones she prefers for sticking in your pants. I bet she’ll know. Gee I reckon she might even help give me a few pointers on the best way to even do this whole thing. Guess I’ll find out soon enough. I just hope she still works there. The last time I was in there and was talking to her about whether they made staplers that you could use for toilet paper substitute (it was just an idea) she mentioned needing a vacation before I came back. I hope she had a good time.