YOUR PLACE OR A FINE

I’m continuing my whole reflection series on stuff like “by invitation only” and “RSVP” with this posting. Now in addition to this whole deal of inviting only certain people to some big event there is the fact that got to be member of some stupid secret club, which qualifies you as a RSVP dude.

If that was enough of a pain then you got the added problem that even if you wade through all that crap you have to put up with knowing you can participate unless you go to THEIR place. Which is okay if the by invitation thing is somewhere cool. But what if it is somewhere that really sucks?

So if you do manage to get to go then you end up getting stuck being bored to death by showing up somewhere that you will probably have to wear a suit or worse. That is something I did discover. None of these by invitation things ever seem to include wearing fun clothes. And you sure can forget about the chance to show off a special thing like a beanie. Man they sure won’t give you a break on that.

Will somebody please tell me why penguins are considered as cool in terms of fashion? They sure must be because most of these by invitation deals seem to expect you to wear one of those stupid tuxedoes. Where is the fun in that? I feel so stupid wearing one of those outfits. Like I’m afraid I might fall asleep and wake up in some coffin or worse because somebody thought I croaked and was ready for being six feet under.

I guess I could even tolerate all of that if once you got into this by invitation thing they had something decent to eat. But that doesn’t happen either. The whole point seems to make this thing as boring as possible. Apparently that is something special enough that you have to let only certain people show up. Those might be the ones you actually hate.

How come they can’t just let you attend the thing if it is going to be that boring, but at least doing it in your own living room. At least that way you could depend upon getting a decent meal out of the deal. Heck I would even be willing to promise to put on socks and underwear underneath my pajamas if that would help.

If they needed like some proof that I actually did whatever they were doing at their by invitation deal I could work something out. Maybe take a picture of myself holding my nose while having a plate of that yucky chicken they seem to serve at those places.

Well I imagine there will be a way to figure it out when and if I get invited to one of those deals. I came close the other day. Over at STINK they were talking about having a by invitation deal and mentioned they might invite me. But I’m not really sure I was that interested though. This one seemed kind of weird. Old Rat Boy, Junior Hemoglobin was saying how he was going to invite me to a party where I got to leap out of an airplane without a parachute. Man I had a hard time figuring how you could do much eating in that kind of a situation. All I know is that he seemed to get such a thrill out of telling me how much fun he would have thinking of what it would be like when I hit the ground. Guess it worked for him.