HAVING YOUR MIND IN THE GUTTER

Is this a problem or what? I heard some kind complaining about people having their minds in the gutter. What happens with the rest of their bodies? Makes me wonder.

For a while I was kind of thinking perhaps this was some really weird twist on that whole brainwashing thing. But boy you sure would have to be really stupid to want to wash you brain in water that is a dirty as some water in the gutter.

Still I just can’t help wondering what the appeal to this whole gutter thing is? There has to be some secret I don’t know about.

So I went out to see if I could find somebody who could give me the first hand real, honest to goodness info on this mind in the gutter thing. And there was only one person I could think to ask.

Actually there were two. The first would have been my buddy Otis, but he was tied up working on some project for our boss Dr. Hemoglobin. Now I ask you does anyone by the guy who runs the company we work for called STINK honestly worry about lint multiplying by itself? Well our boss appears too. And he asked my buddy to study on it.

I got no idea what all that involved. However the last I saw my buddy Otis he was rummaging through the dryer checking the lint tray. Then he said something about heading over to the grocery store to check under the Spam cans to make sure they were lint free. Like lint has some brain that thinks hanging out there is fun.

Anyway somehow I know he’s going to get some free Spam out of this in one form or another so I reckon that is okay. Only it doesn’t help me with the mind in the gutter thing.

I ended up dropping by and talking to somebody who always seems to be an expert on stuff that has to do with what is disgusting and not a good thing. Namely I’m speaking of the Reverend Analbe. I just was sure he would know why some people are crazy enough to want to even figure a way to stick their brains in the gutter.

Well the good thing is that the Reverend Analbe was kind enough to answer my question. The bad part is that I had no idea what he was talking about.

As best as I could figure not having your mind in the gutter was the most important thing since the Reverend said that the devil makes people put their minds in the gutter. And to be honest I looked all over the place and I never saw anybody that looked like the Reverend said the devil looks like who was grabbing people and shoving their heads in the gutter against their will.

The closest I came was this dog who seemed to enjoy snooping around the gutter a lot. I suppose he might have been the devil in some dog costume. Only before I could ask the dog trotted off to do his thing with his hind leg raise on a nearby tree.

I best suggestion I can make is that if by chance you seem some weird dude hanging around a gutter that is toting a pitch fork and has horns and a cape I wouldn’t listen to him. And especially if he is trying to get you to believe a gutter is a fun place to stick your head.