LET THE GOOD TIMES COME ON A ROLL

I ask you, if you like to celebrate something do you want to do it with or without something good to eat? I mean how could you honestly do up a birthday or wedding or just about any other fun event and not also include a decent yummie in the process?

Well I suppose some people might try, but not me. And I don’t even feel that is bad in any way.

The only problem I have in that regard is with the people who throw some sort of celebration and then insist upon offering you some yucky crap to eat. The come THIS close to showing how cool they are and then they blow it big time when it comes to what are called refreshments.

Now take with the Reverend Analbe and his Moral Priority pals. Potlucks are sort of a habit with them. I think there is something in the bible about it. Not sure what, but I know the Reverend sure seems to insist that stuffing your face and some potluck is a good thing. And man let me tell you when it comes to being able to stuff your face the Reverend is a champ. Nobody in his church can pack away more food that him.

With his bunch that is no easy challenge either. Man those folks sure love to eat till they can’t hardly breathe from being so stuffed. It sort of makes me wonder if there must be some kind of buffet, all you can eat place in heaven. Because I got a feeling the Reverend and his bunch will be more than a little unhappy if they get up there and they don’t have one.

Anyway the thing is when it comes to potlucks no problem. I enjoy them. However they got some other weird occasions that just don’t make sense to me. Like this think called communion or the Lord’s supper.

I got to tell you that sure is one skimpy meal if is intended to be some supper. All you get is this tiny glass of grape juice and a piece of cracker that is so small you practically need a microscope to see it.

But he calls cracker “bread.” Only one thing I wouldn’t recommend is that you try and make a sandwich out of it. Because that thing is so tiny you could never get any mayonnaise or peanut butter to stick to it.

Plus they never even offer you seconds. Like that little bit is somehow suppose to fill you up.

Course they only mess with that supper once a month on a Sunday so I guess it ain’t as if they expect you to live on it. And I’m sure glad they haven’t decided to have the same meal for their potlucks.

The other times that are sort of weird to me are the times when they have what they call “refreshments.” That amounts to basically some punch that basically tastes more like water than punch and also some cookies. Cookies aren’t so bad. But the big problem is the lady who generally bakes them sort of forgets to take them out of the oven in time. So she ends up covering them in icing as if that will keep you from knowing they are burnt underneath. Believe me it doesn’t work.

Oh well at least Otis and I don’t depend on those refreshments for a meal. And perhaps one of these days that lady will figure out how not to burn the cookies. In the meantime we are just doing our best to pretend we ain’t hungry when she passes out those things.