IN A PICKLE

You ever see those really big jars of pickles they have in some stores. Normally it isn’t like a grocery store. It is some place that they sometimes call a “deli” or “cheese shop” or whatever where they sell food, but ain’t big enough to be called a grocery store.

And a lot of times they will have a huge jar on the counter full of these dill pickles that you can buy just for a snack. Which is okay if you happen to love pickles.

Me, I can take them or leave them, especially the leaving part when I’m broke. But my buddy Otis, well he has this thing about deciding from time to time that pickles are just as good as candy. Never spam mind you, but candy yes.

So he’ll go into one of these places and buy on of these pickles and I just wish that meant he ate it without talking, but that ain’t my luck. Nope with my buddy talking and eaten just sort of go together.

Which is okay I suppose only the thing is I’m not sure when he’s rambling on and on about how good the pickle tastes if he doing so to impress me or convince himself. I don’t seem to matter though because I know he’s going to keep talking about it regardless of what is true.

But I think that even if Otis talks a lot and is doing so to convince himself that the pickle tastes good it don’t work. That’s because I notice that he doesn’t eat them all the time. Just like most things that he gets in a mood to eat that I think are kind of strange or not that great, I know once he has eaten one pickle he won’t do it for a long time again.

Now if he had one of them pickles and then went back to regular stuff that would be cool. However normally what happens is once he eats a pickle that is just the beginning. Oh man after a pickle then he’ll get some kind of brain stupids where he has to taste all kinds of stuff he wouldn’t eat otherwise. I mean will somebody please explain to me why anyone would want to eat snails? Oh excuse me I guess they are called “escar” um something. I can’t remember exactly. All I know is that he can keep them because I’m not going to gobble down something that spends it time in the dirt of some flower bed.

I won’t bore you with all the other weird junk he decides to try, but there is a lot. And I’m just glad when he finally gets over that mood and goes shopping for Spam again. Which thank goodness in his case is at least twice a week. So a few days I can handle that weirdness.

Plus the great thing is that once he goes back to eating Spam again then that means he thinks my jelly beans are cool too. And that means a trip to the candy store.

Which is how I cope with the other insanity. I just keep thinking to myself “candy store, candy store, it’s there I’ll go when Otis says no more!” Hey it works for me. And I just keep trying to remember that while he’s holding that pickle.