THE BEST KEPT KNOWN JUNK

I heard somebody rambling on about the best kept secrets. Only if it was so darn good at being kept a secret how come you end up hearing about it.

That’s the worst thing to me about this whole secret deal. It never really stays a secret. In fact I think the best way to actually keep a secret is to tell everyone. Because when you do that it seems like everyone ends up not caring about it.

And the more bizarre and incredible the known junk is the more it ends up being best kept in that regard. At least to me it works that way.

I hear them for example always talking about things like a government cover up. Well shoot what they ought to do is brag about it. You know like with junk about those darn aliens.

What they really ought to do is instead of not telling anybody sit down and practically shout about it. Hey if there are really aliens then lets have them on television maybe make a few movies and before you know it the whole dang subject will be so boring nobody will care any longer.

At lest it seems like a good plan to me. Because I don’t know anybody that is really cool at actually keeping junk a secret and instead I think we ought to simply not even have secrets, just tell everything to everyone one.

I mean when you think about it if you did that most people would have trouble remembering it anyway. It would cause brain drain and before long you wouldn’t even know on some stuff because you would end up forgetting.

But I reckon you would have a lot of trouble with that part anyway. For one thing people love to gossip. And if they knew all the facts well heck they wouldn’t have anything left to gossip about. Imagine how miserable all those news folks and radio talk show hosts would be if there wasn’t anything to gossip about? Heck they would probably end up going out and invent something to make a secret just so it would end up being known junk.

In the meantime I think I’m going to do my share to help with this problem. I think I’m going to tell everything I ever know about anyone or anything to everyone. And when I run out of junk then I’ll try and borrow some more from somebody else. Hmmm, I wonder if Otis would mind if I used some of his secret junk?

I know I can blab about it first and then tell him. After he sees how much fun it is for everyone to know everything he might even want to make up a few things to tell others himself.

So that’s my plan at the moment. Gee I can’t wait to get started. This could really turn out fun. I just hope Otis thinks so when I get done!