The Expert

His resume read like a dream about some god,

he had two doctorate degrees

and could speak several languages,

supposedly he was so gifted and brilliant

that he could solve any complex problems

with just one quick glance at the evidence,

one word from his lips enough

to completely cure any crisis.

 

Our hearts swelled with hope

over how this genius with such credentials

could stroll into our company

truly appear so incredible with the sunlight behind him

like some divine crusader meant to deliver us,

just got so excited and riveted with adrenaline

from the idea of our misery mishaps

finally coming to an end.

 

The day arrived with such electricity in the air

soon any stress would evaporate

amid his masterful guidance

over our suffering and sadness.

 

But our joy quickly died

when Mr. Super Brain Perfection

came into the room.

 

He walking over to the light switch

squinted and asked, “does this turn the lights on?”

That was the highlight of his visit

things really went down hill from there,

when he asked if the stapler came with instructions

it was time for him to leave.

 

Perhaps he had better days ahead

only they weren’t going to be with us,

if we wanted moronic Einsteins

there were plenty in our office already.