My Fine Print Lament

Oh man this is going to be such a disaster

would have settled for a rental pick up truck,

to visit my future father in law, the pastor

but instead my travel agent just ran amuck.

 

Told me he had got me such an airport deal

the kind of flash wheels that would impress,

at a price that would be such a downright steel

only didn’t mention all that fine print mess.

 

So once I got a look at this insane circus car wheels

knew it was not going to exactly end up a joy,

the seats are made burnt popcorn and banana peels,

and the steering wheel is some from some toy.

 

Having dress so silly to get the insurance is really the pits,

while forced to take Bozo the mechanic along adds to the pain,

not to mention this stupid umbrella roof just give me the fits

with my luck I know it is just surely going to cloud over and rain.

 

Worse of all is that I meeting the Reverend at this local gym

he’s such fanatic for staying in shape and being so very male,

don’t think he’ll be inspired at all by this pansy looking trim

no way Bozo making balloon animals will help me not fail.

 

All I can do is think up some really great convincing lie           

perhaps like how we were performing for some orphan kids,

then keep Bozo from his smacking the Rev with a cream pie

while praying he won’t think I’m sinful for wearing some red Keds.