Camouflage Envy

Dave was a hunter, a sage of secrecy,
guru of covert conspiracies and expert
on the end of the world,
providing it happen because
some invisible “they”
finally worked their diabolic plot
to ruin live for their own gain.

He drove a dark blue van
never let anyone look inside,
but hinted at it containing,
boxes of canned goods,
enough water for ten days,
then mentioned casually
how he had protection
to ensure he outlasted
any form of crisis or emergency.

Sometimes as he left work
for a moment he would
sneak into his vehicle’s back
then appear behind the wheel
dressed in green camouflage,
claimed it was practice
when the time came that cannibals took over
after a nuclear war.

None of that concerned us
as much as his detail description
of some bazooka and hand held rocket launcher
like everyone had such knowledge
with that curl at the corner of his lips
suggested he kept those in his van too.

Eventually, the state of the world
convinced him to quit
so he could take off for his private preserve
intended to outlive any holocaust.

Hoped I didn’t hear him right
since he said it was in some outhouse,
insisted it was bomb proof,
only worry was finding
armor plated toilet paper!