The Ring Is In The Litter Box

Was true love for a Texas dwelling Vet
and a New York gal he found on the net,
that wanted to get married before they met
so they had proxy wedding with help of a pet.

They couldn’t afford for his bride to fly his town
and he was too busy training a pig to be a clown,
thus she sent her cat by train with a bridal gown
it sure made the conductors squint and frown.

Pity that the animal doc got bitten by that rabid dog
because it scrambled his brain for the preparation’s log,
went completely daffy like his mind has slipped a cog
thought he was divine with the name of the Great Fuzzy Zog.

Claimed he could talk to animals who said things so very odd
like calling this one bunny rabbit by the first name of Tod,
even declared that man had evolved from first being a cod
and swore that this gold fish was a prophet for him a god.

Held the ceremony with the two cats and a minister who was a parrot
then went out and found himself a tux for the best man of a ferret,
plus has this diamond lease for the vows made of more than one carat
while selling all his stock to leave his family only manure to inherit.

Poor gal was stunned when she got the DVD of their special day
where her betrothed was cross-eyed and chewing on some hay,
truly stunned when he babbled nonsense in all he had to say
left her as shocked as if he had said he happened to be gay.

Worse of all was that he had it delivered COD in a trunk,
which was lined with fur that came from a skunk,
now she had to say their relationship genuinely stunk
with those love gems all having turned to complete junk.

Desperate on her part to get an annulment without delay
since he says time has come for him to head her way,
driving his customized elephant shaped Chevrolet
for which he saying half the price he expects her to pay.