They

I know they are everywhere,
lurking in my television set, DVD player,
hiding in my closet and microwave,
even inside my oatmeal.

Faceless demons of the shadowy powers
who are plotting to steal the world's supply of chewing gum
being so diabolical they can appear in any shape imaginable.

But they can't fool someone as brilliant as me.
How often I have taken the time for unmasking their disguises,
abducting each of their minions
parading around as a delivery man or other form,
taking them to some secret lair
where I force them to tell all their secrets.

So clever are the ones I capture, begging for mercy,
always claiming they are not part of the they,
however I know better.

It is a noble call, purging deceived of their delusions,
grateful am I to let them rest forever,
having granted them peace inside that box I buried
while they screamed out of joy when I nailed the lid shut.

Too bad so many doctors are part of the they too,
daring to give me drugs and say I am imagining the truth,
at least till I fit them for a box.